


I Think I Love You

by foreverinprinxietyhell



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Concerned Boyfriend, Confessions, Cuddling, Depression, Heart-to-Heart Conversations, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Self-Loathing, Song references, Suicidal Thoughts, Uncertainty, romantic overtones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-28
Updated: 2017-09-28
Packaged: 2019-01-06 08:13:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12207294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foreverinprinxietyhell/pseuds/foreverinprinxietyhell





	I Think I Love You

Demons belonged to everyone whether they wanted to admit it or not, but for one who was the amalgamation of such negativity it was not hard to be lost to darkened urges. If it were not for a bright soul to ground him in place, Virgil would have long ago been lost to thoughts that could quickly spiral out of control and lead down a darkened path less likely to return each time. 

Feeling alone in this world even with a constant companion, he watched as the other slept soundly with slight snores at three forty-five in the morning, the bags under his light blue eyes increasing in depth due to nightmares of the one person he adored most leaving forever. It was bound to happen eventually, which hurt him the worst; he tried so hard to ignore that nagging intuition, but failed in the end considering how long it had taken to warm up to each other. 

“Oh Roman,” the man mused with a sigh, lungs working harder than needed against a heavy sense of pessimism, “I want to tell you about it, but I’m so scared you’ll judge me like you used to.” 

“You know that isn’t true, right Verge?” 

Startled momentarily, the anxious one could tell that his partner had been pretending to slumber for a while, which was unusual considering how adamant he was about getting beauty sleep, “You shouldn’t be up this late.” 

“Can you blame me for worrying?” 

“I’m fine, hon.”

“You and I both know that’s a load of bologna,” the flamboyant one remarked unconvinced of the unstable mental state the other was in usually, “You want to talk about it?”

“Guess I should now that it’s out in the open…” 

“I’m not going to force you to, but if you think it’d be best then I’m here.” 

Struggling with the presented decision, Anxiety did not know what to do at first since these thoughts had been kept a secret for so long it would not be easy to come clean, but technically lying to the one person that he confided in most was another problem altogether. Trust was a defining feature of any relationship, so choosing not to confess would only lead to make him feeling more guilt to deal with, “It’s kind of difficult to talk about, but I’ll try my best.” 

“I’m all ears, my little sour puss.” 

“Princey, do you love me?” 

“We’ve been together for nearly a year now, of course I do.”

“Was it platonic or romantic? You’ve kinda made it unclear.” 

“Both, you’re my best friend and the love of my life. Why do you ask?” 

“That’s just it, I-I… don’t think I deserve your attention,” he started off with a slight grimace at admitting a level of irrational fear since it had been proven wrong countless times, “It’s silly, I should know better by now.”

“It’s not.”

“You’re gonna give the whole ‘You’re crazy, why would you ever think that’ speech, aren’t you?” 

“No, the way you feel is valid.”

“I feel so empty when it comes to anything except you, I don’t want to lose you…”

“You won’t, my love.” 

Silent sobs suppressed for far too long got the best of him before a response could be formed, which would have embarrassed him beyond comprehension had it not been for a strengthened pair of arms that snaked around his middle, fingers combing through his plum colored hair until the warm, thick palm delicately cupped his cheek. Pecks pressed against closed lids to capture each cascading tear, he leaned closer into the only touch he had ever craved when a light hum started to vibrate in the atmosphere in a calming, familiar melody. 

“Is that ‘Jet Black Heart?’”

“Yes, because there’s nothing after midnight that could make me leave.” 

“Ugh, you’re such a dork…” Virgil sighed in fake annoyance as a small smirk stretched pale lips before parting them to let out a soft voice to finish his favorite part of the song, _“The blood in my veins is made up of mistakes. Let’s forget who we are and dive into the dark as we burst into color returning to life.”_

“We all need something to live for.” 

“Did you just quote blink-182? That’s not even the same band!”

“It’s the truth though!”\

“Can’t argue with that especially since you’re the only one keeping me here.” 

“Whatdya mean by that?” 

Trying in vain to retract the statement that slipped out, a chin ducked down in shame as an answer was expected. Every instinct told him not to elaborate, to just let the conversation die away awkwardly, but there was an unexplainable urge to come clean in such a cathartic environment despite inevitable consequences that came with such serious conversation, “Remember when I said I decided to duck out?” 

“Yes, but I don’t see what that has to do with me.”

“I almost removed myself from the equation, decided that it wasn’t worth it anymore.” 

“Virgil…” 

“It didn’t seem like I was wanted, you were better off without me.”

“That is poppycock, you’ve made life so much better for all of us, including me,” Roman declared, trying to subtly look for any physical signs that may have been overlooked and taking a relieved breath when none were found, “Do I need to tell Thomas?” 

“No, the kid doesn’t need to worry more than he already does. Even I know I need to cut ‘im some slack every now and then.”

“This is serious though, the others would understand even at such a late hour.” 

“Lately I’ve been holding him back, you of all people should know that,” he reasoned remorsefully, his tear-stained face glancing back up into those sea-foam eyes that washed over him warmly, “If it gets any worse, I’ll say something, but right now it’d do more harm than good.” 

“I’ll accept that,” his significant other replied with a soft smooch to the center of his forehead, “It took a lot of courage to open up and I’m glad that you were willing to share.” 

“What can I say, I feel safe whenever I’m with you.”

“As you should be, I’m your knight in shining armor.”

“Flight or fight, am I right?” 

“Indeed, is there anything else that you want to get off your chest?”

Taking a moment of consideration, Anxiety rested his cheek against the other’s chest in order to help further calm the unending nervousness that had plagued him for so long when another concern came out without much hesitation, “I’m worried how you think about me, I guess that’s why I asked my opening question.”

“You’re too familiar with rejection.” 

“You’ve already made that point, but… In a way, I’m still nervous about us.” 

“Is there any particular reason?” 

“You’ve already used the L word,” Virgil said simply, crimson colored cheeks giving away what he was building up to, “I think I can finally say it now. Roman… I love you.” 

“I know, but thank you for confirming my suspicions.”


End file.
